What’s in a name?

Looking at the calendar and realizing we are one week away from meeting our baby, I am reminded again we have not decided on a name for our bouncing boy. It’s hard. This will be such a deep part of himself, how he identifies his being, and will affect how he moves through this world for his whole life. It’s powerful.

And somehow I just can’t find it… with his older brother, we knew. We didn’t question it. Henry is a king’s name. Henry literally means ruler of the house. And we know that Henry’s name is 100% right. It’s him.

We don’t know this time. I don’t have that feeling in my soul that I did when we found Henry’s name. James can’t put his finger on it either. We have decided we have to see his face.

Here is what I know: he is a warrior. Henry is a king and this baby boy is a warrior. He needs a warrior’s name. He feels like a warrior- I was not prepared for the movement nor the rapid growth and appetite of this baby. Henry was a snuggly baby in the womb that would kick but stayed pretty well nuzzled into my back. This baby makes my whole abdomen transform into shapes I never thought possible. This baby fought and survived when his twin did not.

Our family and friends ask regularly. In a southern world of monogram-happy mothers, aunts, and friends, this not knowing our baby’s name is not too well received. Most of the child bearing women around me had a full list of names before they ever conceived. I didn’t.

News that baby is still in the womb unnamed is met with everything from annoyance to humor. Shock even. Cantankerous older women roll their eyes and make their comments. Younger milder ladies purse their lips and raise their eyebrows. We have plenty of suggestions thrown at us and I cannot control my face. I have never been very good at controlling my face. I can sensor my words most of the time but I feel my face contort and then it’s out there. Obvious. I don’t like the suggestion. It was their father, grandfather, uncle, brother, favorite literary character’s name. Feelings get hurt. I try to be polite. I try to laugh it off. It’s funny to me how some of these ladies are taken aback. This is our son- naming him is a huge thing for us.

So we are going to be meeting our son soon and we have a big decision to make. We have to decide who he is. We have to decide the moniker with which he will face the world. He is a warrior.